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M’s Musings: Of Adulting

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adult
Photo Credit: doneadulting.com

So I’ve been talking about the adult thing for some time with a couple of friends. Friends who are pretty new to the adult thing like me. I still have a lot of questions to ask. Like at what age does one really become an adult? 18? 21? When you become independent? When you get married? What even makes an adult? My dictionary defines adult as a fully developed person from maturity onward. Are the people we refer to as adults fully developed really? Or is it just the developed physical attributes we refer to?

If adulthood begins at 18, then I’ve swam in the pool of uncertainty for about 5 years. But I think the African culture recognises adults from 21, so that’s a bit more relieving that I’ve had 2 years of being uncertain about the adult thing. To be honest, I find adulthood a tad scary. It’s kinda like you suddenly become responsible for yourself. Parents withdraw monthly allowances, you become very vulnerable to the law, and you’re left to figure out life with no one to walk you through it. There’s really no dress rehearsal for adulthood, it’s almost like it just comes on you. Phew! Beads of sweat are trickling down my face as I try to analyse this.

adulting
Photo Credit: knowyourmeme.com

I still remember how much I wanted to grow up when I was a kid. I just wanted the perks of independence that came with being an adult. But now that I am, I’m almost wishing I could go back. So now you get to make your decisions knowing fully well you’re responsible for them. It’s no surprise my mind is in a constant state of busyness as I try to weigh every thought, every decision, every word on the pros/cons list. The need for perfection almost drives me insane. It’s overwhelming! I’m not done making decisions for myself and you’re telling me someday I’ll be a mom and would have to make decisions for my kids and family. Gee! Wouldn’t that drive me to insanity?

‘M, take one step at a time. Just breathe.’ You may say. But I’ll give you a thousand decisions I’m yet to make; a thousand thoughts fighting for prominence.

Does anyone really figure out the adult thing? Are there rules that guide everyone? For someone like me who loves rules, are there rules to follow? Within my short time of ‘adulting’, I’ve seen those who don’t play by the rules and it works great for them. And those who abide by the rules are called safe and boring. It’s all confusing!

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Yeah sure there are adults who have gone before you and can teach you the ropes. But can your life really be tailored in the same way your mom’s was? Do the same rules still apply? Okay, I really need to hear what you guys have to say about this. I really want to learn from your thoughts and experiences. Thanks!😊

daintym

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2016 Hairstyles

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This is one of those posts that have my male readers feeling lost. Sorry guys! I don’t really know much about any male haircuts but I’ll research on that 🙂 Feel free to share this link with your female friends though, they may find it helpful.

Ever found it hard to pick a hairstyle for the month? Well, you don’t have to worry anymore! My weird obsession for planning and making lists is paying off! After thinking, calculating, identifying seasons and occasions and scribbling in my notebook (yeah, it takes that much effort to come up with plans) I’ve been able to map out 12 hairstyles for the 12 months of the year. 🙂

January- Bob braids

I find this style really unique because it’s not the usual long braids, but a whole lot easier to maintain and yet so versatile! It’s one of those good old hairstyles that have made a huge comeback. Make it fun by mixing colors 🙂 You can check out Kink and I for more tips on this style.

bob braids
Photo Credit: thekinkandi.wordpress.com

February- Side fringe/ Full fringe with Straight, Long Hair 

What better style for the month of love than really long, silky hair you can easily pull your fingers through? Or watch as the wind blows through your hair! I’ve probably seen too many movies! 🙂 Anywho, the side fringe is a fabulous look especially if you’ve got your brows done! The long length of the hair gives a slimming look for chubby faces and the side fringe works wonders for pronounced foreheads (like mine) LOL.

A full fringe hairdo with this straight, long hair equally looks fab and edgy! I find it hard to pull off the full fringe hairstyle that’s why I’ve stuck with my safe zone, the side fringe. But if you’re confident you can pull off the full fringe, by all means, go for it! 😀

March- Centre part 

The centre parted hairstyle is a bit tricky to pull off because it doesn’t suit all faces. Consult with your hairstylist to know if this style fits your face before you end up wearing a sad hairdo. This hairstyle is elegant and it works well with both straight and wavy hair.

centre part
Photo credit: Stylesweekly.com

April-Bohemian Curls

These days I’m really into the whole full hair look and the bohemian curls are just perfect! You can either part it to the side or the centre as it best works for your face. Most bohemian weaves do not require brushing or combing; you just have to wet it a bit and pull your hands through to smooth out tangles and trim when the need arises. Pretty easy to maintain!

bohemian curls
Photo Credit: Pulse.ng

 

May- Marley /kinky twists 

This is a versatile look to carry for the long month of May (sometimes I think May has more than 31 days-LOL). You can easily maintain the look as well as the roots of your natural hair. It’s a fabulous hair to get creative with and style as you love!

twists
Photo Credit: naturalhairmag.com

June- Short hair

Rihanna is known for her famous short hairstyles and you’ve gotta agree this look is super chic! It oozes confidence and class. Easy to maintain and ready to go. However, you don’t just go to any hairdresser to get this done; identify those with the special skill-set to get this cut neat and precise. You would totally love it! The short hair is a good deviation from the long hairstyles in the previous months. 🙂

Rihanna Launches 'Fashion Against AIDS'
Photo Credit: Strayhair.com

 

July- Short curly hairstyle 

As the months get hotter, short hairstyles are the way forward! This look can be achieved by perming your natural hair and using rollers to keep it in place or by simply fixing short, curly weaves which bounce lightly on the nape of your neck. You may have to constantly curl it to keep the hair bouncy and in place. Make any parting of your choice for this hairstyle and work it gurl! 😉

curly short
Photo Credit: short-haircut.com

 

August- ponytail 

It’s summer time for others while it’s just another hot month for us in this part of the world. You’ve got to have your hair well relaxed to get the sleek look (especially for my African readers). You wouldn’t want to comb through tough roots while carrying the ponytail 😛 This hairstyle can be let down and also pulled up in a bun or doughnut. It brings out the face and it’s really good for the hot season. Remember to accessorize while carrying this hairstyle so you don’t look like a plain bagel. It’s a big NO to bushy eyebrows!

*** you could actually opt for side bangs with the ponytail if you’re not comfortable exposing your forehead.

ponytail
Photo Credit: stylisheve.com

September – Long box braids 

It’s back to school for some, while for others, it’s just another working month. Long box braids are beautiful and easy to maintain. I love this hairstyle because you can easily style it any way you want; up-dos or let downs, just get creative! I’m lazy about tiny braids so I always opt for the big box braids and yeah, mixed colours make it fun! (as long as you don’t look like a rainbow) The longer the braids, the merrier! 😉

Boxbraids
Photo Credit: the-hairstylist.com

October- Full/ Side Fringe Bob 

The bob is a good follow-up after the long braids. The full fringe bob gives the gorgeous Cleopatra look. The full fringe is rather daring because it doesn’t fit everyone . If you’re like me who isn’t as daring to pull it off, no worries! The side fringe is pretty gorgeous as well. ❤

 

November- Crochet braids (With Marley Hair)

Crochet braids are pretty easy to install, you can even DIY! This is another style with exciting variations! Get creative with your hair! It’s a perfect hairstyle that allows you maintain the roots of your natural hair while carrying it. Have fun with this look!

crochet
Photo Credit: blacknaps.org

December- Wavy layered hair

This doesn’t necessarily have to be as long as the straight hair in February, but it should be at least shoulder length so it doesn’t look like you’re repeating the hairstyle from July. The style is best done with hair left out to give it a more natural look. For readers with already long hair, you can achieve this look by curling your hair and trimming it in layers. You can part it any way you want! This hairstyle is very girly and super chic! (especially with the right hair) #Christmashair 😛

wavy hair
Photo Credit: womenhairpict.xyz

I actually had a lot of fun compiling this list and I hope you have more fun while making the hairstyles! I should quickly add that you need to constantly treat your natural hair before and after making any of the hairstyles so you don’t experience any form of hair loss. Do keep some space between the hairstyles for your hair to rest a bit.

You don’t have to strictly follow the order, feel free to mix the hairstyles as you like. You can decide to switch February and April for instance.

As lovely as these hairstyles are, it would be a shame to wear them with an ugly inside! So as you groom your hair and outside appearance, do not forget to also work on having a more beautiful inside! I pray for the grace to be beautiful inside out. ❤

Remain fabulous!

© Mfon Etuk, 2016

***What’s your favourite hairstyle? And what style would you like to have added to this list? Comment in the section below 🙂

Hairstyles: Crotchet Braids

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Hey guys!
So today I’ll be exploring the crotchet braids hairstyle. Thanks to some really encouraging friends and a ton of helpful YouTube videos, I was able to get this hairstyle installed. And hey, it’s pretty easy to DIY.
I installed them with the help of my sis and it came out pretty amazing. I used Janet Collection Marley hair for the install but I’ve seen videos where other extensions were used as well.

Here are the things you’ll need
1. Marley hair (I used 3 packs) or any extensions of your choice
2. Crotchet pin (latch and hook)
3. Moisturizer and water

4. Pair of scissors
5. Perm rods

Phototastic-22_11_2015_745be4d8-be44-41f3-b29a-558aec69eae0
Photo credit: daintym.com

Steps

1. Weave your hair into cornrows of your choice

2. Tuck in the tail and begin to crochet on it

3. Insert the crotchet pin with the latch open, pick a piece of the Marley hair and place securely in the hook and close the latch

4. Pull the crotchet pin out with the piece of hair, open it and put in the remaining piece of hair through the tunnel created to make a knot. Tug lightly to tighten the knot. You could also make two or three knots to secure it.

5. Repeat process across cornrows

6. When you get to the parting, as against putting both ends of the hair through the tunnel to make a knot, you are to put in a single strand. This gives the parting a more natural look and a less bulky feel.

For mine, I had two side partings; left and right and a center part so I repeated the process in those partings.

7. At the end of the installations I had quite a full mane so I had to trim the scraggly hairs.

daintym

8. I rolled them using perm rods. You may want to watch videos on this so you get the proper technique. I missed it the first time and hated how the curls came out. You could also do the Bantu knots to get amazing curls.

9. Carefully insert knots into a cup of steaming hot water for about 15-60 seconds. Towel dry immediately. I think it’s best to get someone help you do this part so you don’t burn yourself.

10. Allow the hair to fully dry before taking out the perm rods. I allowed mine all through the night and took off the perm rods in the morning.

Maintenance
It’s unbelievably easy to maintain. You can sleep with a light scarf or a soft night cap to secure the curls. You could also apply shea butter or any other hair product of your choice regularly to the cornrows to maintain the moisture of your hair.
So that’s it!

Here are nine ways you could style your crotchet braids:

 

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Photo credit: daintym.com

Hope you enjoyed this!
Lots of love,

© Mfon Etuk, 2015

daintym

Weekend Specials II

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Hello there!

It’s a lovely weekend over here. My country celebrated her 55th year of independence 2 days back and it was really cool. God bless Nigeria! *waves imaginary flag*

Lately I’ve been exploring photography using this awesome camera phone I got. Plus I’ve been busy  with some editing as well. I’ll be sharing some of the pictures and some quotes on creativity you need to reflect on this weekend.

Let’s get creative! 😉

photo by me
photo by me

To live a creative life, we must lose our fear of being wrong- Joseph Chilton Pearce

Photo by me
Photo by me

How is your devotion? Boring? Why not make it colorful and fun! 🙂

Photo by me
Photo by me

Creativity involves breaking out of established patterns in order to look at things in a different way- Edward de Bono

photo by me
photo by me

See what the others don’t see- that’s creativity!

life in colors
Photo by me

Creativity is intelligence having fun- Albert Einstein

Photo by me
Photo by me

My journals!!! Don’t you just love em! Each has its own story to tell 🙂

stickyyy
Photo by me

Ooops! Only a few can read this… but never forget, God loves you!

Photo by me
Photo by me

Creativity can release you from the limitations that the world has constructed around you; the everyday, mundane, 9-5 jail cell where everybody is waiting for the weekend to party so they can get outside of their head. –Robert LaSardo

It’s a wrap for today!

Do something creative everyday and remember to have fun doing it! 🙂

Creativity is contagious, pass it on! -Albert Einstein

Lots of love ❤

© Mfon Etuk, 2015

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Style 101- How to Style Basic Tops

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Hey guys!

So just after writing on Zombieland, the Lord blessed me with two free days! 😀 Now I get to stay indoors and find fun stuffs to do (asides eating and  watching TV in my pj). One of such for me is playing dress up and taking pictures. Silly as it may sound, I actually enjoy every bit of it and it makes me happy. Sorry guys, I know this may  be pretty hard to relate 🙂

Remember how we turned boredom to creativity last time, well this time I decided to style some good ol’ basic tops in my closet. The first picture is how how the top naturally looks-plain as a bagel. The other two are the outcomes of accessorizing. Have fun!

  1. Plain Pink top
    Photo by me
    Photos by me

    2. Black and White Top

    Photo by me
    Photo by me

    3. Green Top

    Photo by me
    Photo by me

    4. The Plain Black Top

    Photo by me
    Photo by me

    5. Red Top

    Photo by me
    Photo by me

    6. Grey T-shirt 

    Photo by me
    Photo by me

    7. Blue top

    Photo by me
    Photo by me

    8. DIY shirt

    Photo by me
    Photo by me

    Phew! That’s it for now. The key is to play with accessories in transforming a plain ol’ basic top into some super chic outfit.

    Got any basic fashion items you would like us to style? Please drop your suggestions in the comments section. Gracias!

    And hey, how are you spending the holidays? Hope you’re doing something you love. Remember an idle mind is the Devil’s playground. Don’t give room for the devil to do cartwheels in your life. Keep busy. Be creative!

    God bless you! ❤

    Happy holidays!

© Mfon Etuk, 2015

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The Bus Wait

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Tired. Exhausted.
The hot mid-day sun liberally shines down on me, withholding nothing.
The light reflects on my sunshades
Queuing like ants searching for food, we all line up
At the mercy of the buses
When they would arrive, no one knows
Yet we patiently wait, unsure of the possibility of getting on the next bus.

No shade. The winds are on a standstill.
Been standing for a while now
40 minutes or 40 hours?
I’m afraid I can’t tell the difference
Looking at my phone screen-
My only companion
Hoping to get a ping or a buzz…
Nothing.

The blank screen reflects an image of me right now-
Alone. Abandoned.
I sigh and look up, desperate for a bus.
Buses begin to drive by
None going on my route.
Tired commuters begin to sit on the hot pavement
The closest thing to comfort.

Whatever happened to the over 100 BRT buses?
Stuck in traffic?
Inadequate?
Or the obvious fuel scarcity that has crippled every institution?
My mind shuts down for a minute
Unable to analyse the unpleasant situation.
I need a drink. Something cold.
I glance around searching for a mobile drink carrier.

Thankfully there he is! I quickly pay for the bottle of apple drink, twice its normal price and gulp like a girl who has sojourned the Sahara desert for a month without water.
The long queue behind me gives me a thin thread of hope to grasp.

It’s been 4 hours already.
I should be in bed right now.
My jacket is off and my shirt untucked
Shoes taken off, earplugs in place,playing songs that do little or nothing in easing my depression,
I’m sitting on the pavement with careless abandon
Don’t get me wrong, I’m way past anger and disappointment
I just want to go home.

A brilliant light penetrates through the dark night
As it gets closer, hope springs forth
Everyone scrambles to their feet.
Finally, it’s here.
I don’t care about the tiresome wait anymore
All that matters is that the bus is here and I’m on my way home.

© Mfon Etuk, 2015

Photo credit: www.skyscrappercity.com
Photo credit: http://www.skyscrapercity.com

Weekend Specials

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Hey guys!

I haven’t blogged in a while and I feel so bad 😦 😦 😦

I have been looking for something big and beautiful to write but nothing has come to mind.

But then I got the inspiration to start Live Series where I write about my everyday life with or without the big explosive moments.

I hope you enjoy this.

For the past three weekends, I have been exploring my cooking skills.

First Weekend 

I made Strawberry yogurt smoothie with banana and strawberry toppings. Along with fresh fruits. Yummy!

IMG_3375
Photo by Me

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law- Gal 5:22-23

Second Weekend

I made fun pink pancakes for breakfast alongside a cup of chocolate drink. I love colors and having my food colored is super cool! Thanks to a friend who gave me the recipe.

IMG_3623
Photo by Me

 Nehemiah said, “Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is holy to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength- Neh 8:10

Third Weekend

I made jollof rice, peppered beef and fried plantain. This was an anniversary meal for my sister and brother inlaw and thankfully they loved it!

I’m so proud of this meal because I’m quite a lazy cook; I don’t like cooking all the time but whenever I do, I’m all in 😀 😀 I know I should be more consistent with these things I take as mere hobbies. And so should you! What are those things you do with ease and take as mere hobbies? Why not use them to bless the world around you?

IMG_3622
Photo by me

Seest thou a man diligent in his business? he shall stand before kings; he shall not stand before mean men- Prov 22:29

Well, that’s what went on for the past three weeks I went MIA. By God’s grace I will be more consistent no matter how short the post is…I know there would be an inspiring message in there somewhere to help you live a victorious life.

Lemme get back to work, my lunch break is over *sobs*

Have a blessed day!

© Mfon Etuk, 2015

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