Posted in Inspiration, Mental Health Files

Live or Leave

Photo Credit: Pexels

I never want you to feel this way,

You know, like you’re deep in a pit and no one even knows you’re there,

Like the grave is a resting place and life is for the restless,

Like you’re speaking but no one is listening,

Like you’re dying and no one is seeing.

I see you.

I hear you.

And it sucks that you feel this way.

I wish you never did,

I wish your smile never set like the sun,

I wish your laughter didn’t seem like the fading sound of distant waves,

I wish your heart wasn’t hard from all the broken pieces that couldn’t be glued back together.

I wish I could take your pain away,

Absorb the pain like a sponge until you’re free from it,

I wish you didn’t know what it meant to walk under a dark cloud even when the sun was shining overhead,

I wish you didn’t know what it felt like to cry ‘Eli Eli Lama Sabachtani!’

That moment where you begin to question the efficacy of the words ‘I will never leave you nor forsake you,’ while reality screams otherwise.

But you have to feel these things,

For that’s how you’ll know how to comfort others who feel same.

If I hadn’t gone through them, I wouldn’t know what to say to you.

So to answer your question, live or leave? I think it’s best we live ready to leave when our appointment with death comes, as it’s appointed for men once to die, but after this the judgment (Heb 9:27).

So live, my darling! For life is already fleeting as it it seems.

Love,

M.❤️

Posted in Mental Health Files

I wander

I wander.

Lost, and angry,

Bland, emotionally,

Head gone,

Dead, Long gone,

Fears, all gone,

Shredded. Torn.

I wander.

I Laugh, but low-key,

Sadness envelopes me.

I Heard one,

Dare another one,

Fair and alone,

Subconscious dead. Long gone.

Continue reading “I wander”

Posted in Mental Health Files

The Girl Who Almost Killed Herself

It was my second day in the ward. I could see all the distressed faces— my mom, my dad, and even my brothers looked sad. I shut my eyes hard, trying to picture myself in another place. A peaceful place. A quiet place. Where is that white light they say people see when they’re about to crossover?

Continue reading “The Girl Who Almost Killed Herself”

Posted in Mental Health Files

Are we more depressed in this generation?

Hey guys!

So I had my first Instagram question Poll yesterday! Yes, I’m a millennial with an old soul (and still trying to catch up on all these new features on social media- no judging!) Anyway, here was my question: “would you say that life as we know it now is more depressing than it was for generations before us?” Continue reading “Are we more depressed in this generation?”

Posted in Inspiration

Empty

I woke up one morning feeling empty. One would think to feel empty is to feel lighter and even relieved. On the contrary, my body felt like a thousand boulders when I got outta bed. I tried to adjust my eyes to the blankness of my existence. With a deep sigh I began what seemed to be an endless humdrum day. Continue reading “Empty”

Posted in Inspiration

How to come out of a dark phase

Hi guys,

I’m sure my last post must have left a lot of you feeling gloomy. I kinda feel bad every time I don’t stick to the vision of my blog, which is to “inspire you to live victorious lives.” What I’ve come to understand however, is that living a victorious life doesn’t mean I’ll always write about rainbows and unicorns. I’ve always been honest here and I wouldn’t hesitate to use my life experiences to pass a message of how you too can be victorious.

Going through dark phases can be really tough, especially when you don’t have people around who understand you. But I don’t want you to linger too long in that dark phase, I want you to come out of it victorious. So sitback and enjoy the tidbits I’d be sharing as the Holy Spirit guides me. Continue reading “How to come out of a dark phase”

Posted in Inspiration, LTTD

Letters to the Depressed 1

LTTDSo I finally got the courage to write to you. Please read, cause I’m not gonna write you off, like they did. Do you feel intense sadness, hopelessness, emptiness and/or loss of interest in the things you once enjoyed? Do you feel guilty, worthless, absolutely helpless and and/or anxious? Or do you have thoughts of death or suicide quite often? If you said yes to any of these, then I’m writing this for you. Continue reading “Letters to the Depressed 1”