Seems September has been on fast forward. I’m not about to get anxious about the year ending already, so ama just stop there. 😁 Hope you’re having the best of the month. Alright, let’s dive into today’s challenge.
Growing up in a culture where everyone had to ‘toughen up’ meant that negative emotions of anger, pain, hurt, depression etc. had to be hidden or suppressed. It was (and still is) a culture founded on the misconception that emotions make you weak. Those who have read Chinua Achebe’s famous ‘Things Fall Apart’ will understand how crazy it gets when one begins to prove a point of being strong rather than weak. It’s a survivor’s race. Continue reading “How to Deal with the Broken”→
Write a letter to someone who has hurt you recently
Wow! This is a tough one.
Let’s do this.
Here it is:
This is to let you know you brutally hurt me; constantly stabbing my fragile heart with a sharp dagger. Yes, I gave you my heart when you clearly had no capacity to love. You didn’t hurt me alone but constantly hurt others, dragging a trail of broken hearts in your wake.
You always wanted your way even when you knew it wasn’t going to work out. You always went overboard with your imaginations and emotions, hurting me every time another one fell through. You hated me and did a poor job at disguising it. You never believed in me but constantly reminded me of my weaknesses.
I don’t blame you for hurting me. Your immaturity clearly got a strong hold of you and blinded you from the truth. You never saw me for who I was, but for some weakling with a heart made of cheese.
I forgive you because you didn’t know better. I set you up for failure by making you an invincible superhuman when you were a mere human with skin and bones.
I forgive you for letting my heart hurt, once, twice…multiple cuts. With the bleeding came the strength to allow the healing waters flow. With scars to tell the story, I’ve become the strong woman I was meant to be. Thank you for hurting me, even though you didn’t know it was to make me stronger.
I forgive me for hurting me.
What a twist right?
It was pretty hard writing this letter. I could easily think of a number of people who had hurt me in the past and conveniently write a long essay to this effect. But deep down, I know I hurt myself by giving them the power to hurt me. Most of which (the hurt) didn’t even happen in reality as much as they did in my head-brooding over a hurt that cut so deep in my mind while it was a mere brush of the skin in reality.
Most people find it a lot easier to forgive others than themselves. They blame themselves for everything and undermine what they have going on good for them-I inclusive. So yeah, this is my letter to me. Not to some guy who broke my heart, or a parent that never truly understood, or a friend that said hurtful words-no, this is a letter to me.
Are you holding on to hurts that you might have caused? Or are you holding on to people who have hurt you in the past? Take some time out to think about this and forgive the people involved, including yourself. A hurting heart will always hurt others.