I know you hurt. I hurt too.
It’s a stabbing pain I can’t explain.
Like I’m drowning in the Atlantic Ocean
With no lifeguard in sight
Gasping for air
I’m afraid this pain is too much
For my feeble shoulders to bear
Shoulders slumped from the confidence that has been blown away.
I used to be the happy one
With the cheerful smiles
And big brown eyes
Now I’m the dark girl
Hiding in the shadows
Afraid to see my reflection
Because it just may reflect my heart
Oh the pain! It rips me apart!
The tears! They’ve formed an ocean
Salty waters, I shed
Salty waters I drown in
I know what it means to be depressed
I almost know it as I do my middle name
I still feel its slithery fingers
Wrapped around my cold skin
I’ve been that way too long.
Hurts do heal.
Hearts do mend
Nights do end
Joy comes in the morning
So what makes your hurt more special?
Or any less?
Hurt is hurt.
The heart bleeds too-
It’s an organ after all!
Hurts do heal
Tears get dried up
The sun shines after the rain
This weary heart of mine
Someday shall dance again
To the tune of love
These patched lips will crack a smile
For this storm isn’t to drown you
But to make you stronger
To make you grow
So pick up the pieces of what’s left
Give it back to the Fixer
Rise up and live
Today isn’t the death of you
Hurts do heal, my love.
©Mfon Etuk, 2016
He heals the heartbroken and bandages their wounds- Psalm 147:3
If your heart is broken, you’ll find God right there; if you’re kicked in the gut, he’ll help you catch your breath.- Psalm 34:18
Write a letter to someone who has hurt you recently
Wow! This is a tough one.
Let’s do this.
Here it is:
This is to let you know you brutally hurt me; constantly stabbing my fragile heart with a sharp dagger. Yes, I gave you my heart when you clearly had no capacity to love. You didn’t hurt me alone but constantly hurt others, dragging a trail of broken hearts in your wake.
You always wanted your way even when you knew it wasn’t going to work out. You always went overboard with your imaginations and emotions, hurting me every time another one fell through. You hated me and did a poor job at disguising it. You never believed in me but constantly reminded me of my weaknesses.
I don’t blame you for hurting me. Your immaturity clearly got a strong hold of you and blinded you from the truth. You never saw me for who I was, but for some weakling with a heart made of cheese.
I forgive you because you didn’t know better. I set you up for failure by making you an invincible superhuman when you were a mere human with skin and bones.
I forgive you for letting my heart hurt, once, twice…multiple cuts. With the bleeding came the strength to allow the healing waters flow. With scars to tell the story, I’ve become the strong woman I was meant to be. Thank you for hurting me, even though you didn’t know it was to make me stronger.
I forgive me for hurting me.
What a twist right?
It was pretty hard writing this letter. I could easily think of a number of people who had hurt me in the past and conveniently write a long essay to this effect. But deep down, I know I hurt myself by giving them the power to hurt me. Most of which (the hurt) didn’t even happen in reality as much as they did in my head-brooding over a hurt that cut so deep in my mind while it was a mere brush of the skin in reality.
Most people find it a lot easier to forgive others than themselves. They blame themselves for everything and undermine what they have going on good for them-I inclusive. So yeah, this is my letter to me. Not to some guy who broke my heart, or a parent that never truly understood, or a friend that said hurtful words-no, this is a letter to me.
Are you holding on to hurts that you might have caused? Or are you holding on to people who have hurt you in the past? Take some time out to think about this and forgive the people involved, including yourself. A hurting heart will always hurt others.
Day 9 done, 22 more to go!
Yes we can!
Happy Sunday guys!