Posted in Poetry

Jekyll and Hyde

Photo credit: figment.com
Photo credit: figment.com

Please stay.
No, leave.
Yes. No.
I’m up. I’m down
I’m happy and I’m sad
Call me Yin Yang
Cause I’m white and I’m black
I’m good and I’m bad
Rename me Jekyll and Hyde
It’s like I’m playing hide and seek
I want you. Then I don’t.
I’m in and I’m out
I enjoy your company
You’re sweet. You’re sour.
Oh sweet whispers of
Impending doom!

Stay.
No, leave.
I want you and then I don’t
You’re all I want
My obsession. My illusion
You appear when they disappear
My desires, my lusts
Insatiable belly of wants
The depths of depression

Stay.
No, leave.
I can’t keep living this way
I’m happy and I’m sad
I’m good and I’m bad
I’m up and I’m down
Leave me for good
Or stay…if you choose

No! Leave me
I want to be free
These chains aint bracelets
Set me free
Shine the light on me
The dark gets lonely at night

Stay.
No, Leave.
You don’t own me anymore.

© Mfon Etuk, 2015

I want to do what is good, but I don’t. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway.

Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death? 

Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord.

~Rom 7:19, 24-25 (NLT)

Photo credit: goodreads.com
Photo credit: goodreads.com
Posted in Poetry

Dark Nights

I want to find solace in the dark

Even if it is for a night

Hiding behind the shadows

So no one sees the tears

Hot. They fall freely like a waterfall

I’m afraid of the sun

It just might burn my face

So I cover my face with my hands

The cold night pierces deep

With the sharp claws of dark

The pain turns to pleasure

As blood spills, cleaning the void

Oh sweet dark of night!

Take my pain away

Hide my fears behind the shadows

Let the sun not awaken

To my unending tears

Hand in chest-hole in heart

Nothing left behind

© Mfon Etuk, 2015

Photo Credit: flickrhivemind.net
Photo Credit: flickrhivemind.net
Posted in Poetry, Series

The Night Before Light

tumblr_n3ejg6dtxz1s4sut4o1_500
Photo credit: http://www.rebloggy.com

Part One

Running, panting, falling,

There it was again, the monster she dreaded,

Ripping off everything that got in its way,

Green algae laced his hideous form,

Horns punctuated his face; his claws were of a bear,

He kept howling like a wolf,

Fear surrounded her like a fence,

Heart pounding, throat thickening, fists clenched, she tried to get up again,

Groping in the dark, trying to find her way,

Should she scream for help?

Who would answer her?

She was alone, just as she wanted,

Heavy footsteps kept getting closer,

Sweat and blood dripping from her as she tried to find a way out

The web she was in was all so scary,

There was no way out of it,

If there was a God, he sure wouldn’t want to save her-she was too far gone to be saved,

The hurt filled her heart till it began to overflow

Another shrill disturbed the silence of the night,

The monster had wrenched the heart of another victim,

For how long would she keep running in circles?

But who was she to end the life she never owned?

Lost, afraid, cold, lonely, she stopped running,

She shivered as the cold wind brushed her fragile skin,

With the shackles on her wrists and ankles,

She sat waiting for her turn like a cow led to slaughter,

If only He could save her-

If only He still loved her like He always said,

Wiping the tears off her dirt covered face,

She looked up to see the monster in front of her,

A knot tightened in her throat, too hard to swallow

There he was with the stench of death oozing out of him,

He stretched out his claws towards her heart,

The end had come for her,

He was going to rip off every bit of her,

Even though his blood thirst remained insatiable,

She knew she deserved this,

Shutting her eyes, she cried from the depths of her heart

JESUS!!!!

Thunder, lightning, earthquake-then came the silence

The silence that screamed louder than the storm,

She slowly opened her eyes,

The monster was gone,

Shackles fell off her wrists and ankles,

She was free, or was she dreaming?

blog image
http://www.loverofdarkness.net

Would the monster come again, stronger and more at rage than it was?

Footnote:

Lots of us struggle with one monster or the other(addictions, obsessions, things we would love to change, things we can’t tell anyone), we keep running around in the thick web of sins. But God is our ever present help in times of need, always ready to save you. Just call on Him. Its time to stop running.

© Mfon Etuk, 2015.

Posted in Featured, Poetry

Innocence to the Dark Side of Love

Innocent to the dark side of love ,she was prepared,she was not!

The woman on the screen, made it look easy, Schooled her about d perks of love,
Failed to illuminate her on the workings of the soul in the matter .
Head first she dived into it,
Carrying all the care poured into her by her African mother,
That made her a full African woman…
One that gave herself selflessly,
One that starved to let others have their fill,
One that left the warmth of her bed at first light of dawn to see that others lacked nothing till dusk,
One that hushed her pain,
To comfort her wailing neighbour…
All that she carried and gave to a man she called Love,
Not caring if love gave back or not.
But love ignored,
It didn’t just ignore,
It turned dark,
Became the dagger that pierced her heart and made it loose rhythm of its beat…
Dragging life out of her slowly,
Caged her soul without ministering sweet music that would calm her raging spirit,
It gave silence as dead as the grave,
Making the voices in her louder with each passing day.
Love numbed her heart and carved out jagged lines that become scars,
That numbness only awakened by pain,
Pain that went deep and unending like falling in a black hole in one of her nightmares,
It just wouldn’t stop!
Pain so strong it knocked down those firm brown shoulders that once stood up so high and proud as the peacock in its parade,
Pain so devoid of words,
Thought had no meaning in her mind,
It took out pieces of her soul one by one,
Till the very foundations of it was nothing but rubble.
This kind of pain made her walk mindlessly in the dead of the night,
With no moon to shine and give little light as a sign of hope,
Wandering about in circles,
Lost, she had no strength left in her to fight and defend her pride.
Slowly those long dark strong legs like beautifully carved out pillers of bronze,sank down,
Arms of no other but hers wrapped around her,
Not for fear that should be running down her spine because of the dark ,
But for the ice cold feeling emanating from her depths,
Her soul seemed to be in hell already,
Being tortured by non other but hunted memories of what she once thought was love.
Slowly her head followed the movement of her caving shoulders,
And it began!!!
Her eyes poured it all out,
Eyes poured out hurt,
Disappointment, shame, pain, disgust,
In form of salty water.
She cried an ocean and let herself soak in it,
Even though she didn’t know how to swim out,
She didn’t drown…
What would have been the death of her became her liberation,
She knew that was all she needed and like the drum that sounds its loudest before it tears,
She rises,
Like a lioness hunting in the dark,
Her eyes adjust to the darkness and she begins to prowl,
Making her way home,
Deaf to the millions of crickets singing songs to draw her attention,
She goes back to her beginnings,
She feels strong,
She begins to regain her grounds as she once did,
She keeps walking,
Walking till she finds love that would give back.
Love that would nurture,
Love that would care,
Love so mad, Romeo and Juliet would envy it, Love so precious and graceful seconded only by that of her Creator,
Love so pure only to be compared to the spring of Kerang,
Love that builds a soul to supernatural maturity on a solid rock,
Love that would deserve her sacrifice,
Love that would be proud and brave enough to shout and sing her praises from the peaks of Kilimanjaro!!!
But until then,
She would heal and then wait,
For hope and faith are the only sure things she holds on to.
Written by Miss Yelnen
Photo credit: fierceforblackwomen.com