Posted on by Dainty M · 14 Comments

Forsaken 2: Night Falls

Lisa tried to adjust to the neon lights in the club a friend invited her to. She quickly spotted her friends who beckoned her to the bar. Sensitive parts of her, silently whispering enduring memories of the accident that had claimed her parents. Memories, writhed in a thorny knot inside her, struggling for expression, persistently stretching out through her mouth up into her mind so much that she didn’t need to be told to battle them back down with alcohol.

‘Give me your hardest drink!’ Lisa said to the bartender as she grabbed a stool. Throwing caution to the wind, she was set to drown her sorrows with alcohol.

Loud cheers from friends as she took the first two shots of tequila. In no time, she got into a drinking challenge with Andrew who had been watching her for a while.

‘Ten shots!’ he screamed at the bartender pointing to Lisa. ‘You win I pay’, he challenged. Shot after shot they drank with Andrew who gave up after only six shots and paid for the drinks as the challenge required.

Lisa gave a loud shout as she dropped the tenth empty glass. Her friends roared with excitement at her victorious conquest. ‘Here, take this. It takes away your worries’ Gordon, Lisa’s friend handed a pill.

‘What’s this?’ Lisa asked naively.

‘Just call her molly.’ Gordon replied with a wild grin.

The other friends laughed, knowing molly was another name for ecstasy. The drug that kept them on an all-time high.

Lisa hesitated at first until the crowd started cheering her on. Mouth open, she threw in the pill, and pushed it down with another shot of tequila which had suddenly become a pal to cherish. Grimacing, she squeezed the lime into her mouth savouring its sour taste. ‘Let’s get this party started!’ Lisa exclaimed with so much energy and enthusiasm. She had soon forgotten about the sorrow that had weighed her down for the past weeks.

Amazingly, Lisa came up with fantastic dance moves which left the crowd cheering and dancing along.

After a while, she felt lightheaded and everything seemed blurry.

‘I’ll be leaving now’ Lisa yelled across the room to her friends who couldn’t hear her against the blasting stereo.

‘Are you sure you can go on your own?’ They responded without an iota of concern.

Lisa gave a blind nod and headed toward the door. Unsure if it was a yes or no response. Bumping through people, she set out.

Lisa staggered her way home. There was no taxi in clear sight and the club wasn’t far from home she thought.

Photo credit: onlyjust21.tumblr.com
Photo credit: onlyjust21.tumblr.com

She had not gone half way when she heard deafening sounds of gunshots blazing through the dark shadowy night. For what seemed like eternity, she was frozen in her tracks. Her eyes widened as the head lamps of a getaway van flashed across her face. Piercing through her inmost consciousness. She was in trouble and her drunk head could barely think of an escape route as the Van pulled up aggressively beside her. The screeching sound of the tyres clenched by the tooth of the brakes seemed to have woken her from a distant slumber.  The back door flew open right beside her.

‘Get in!’ he yelled pointing his gun at her. His masked face got Lisa uneasy and her mind flew at a sight of his bare brawny arm. Sweat trickled down her face despite the cold wind of winter as she sat still in the back seat of the old wagon. Everything was hazy, then blank- she fell unconscious with a thud on the back seat of the van.

© Mfon Etuk, 2015

Posted on by Dainty M · 10 Comments

Forsaken 1: The incidence

Lisa woke up to see the time way past what she had expected. She couldn’t even remember when she had slept off. Weary from the tempests of life, she laid with her back on the ground. Blankly staring at the smoke stained ceiling till she fell asleep.

Grabbing her coat from the rusty coat hanger, she stepped out for an evening stroll to clear her head.

After walking two blocks, she met some Christian fanatics who insisted on giving her gospel tracts. “Oh, please!” she thought. “God doesn’t want to have anything to do with me” she muttered as she politely collected the piece of paper from this rather aggressive group, screaming and yelling out lots of religious stuffs she couldn’t make out. She glanced at the paper which had boldly written ‘THE CROSS: YOUR ONLY WAY OUT’. How would there be only one way out? Even airplanes had at least 2 exit doors, she shook her head as she absent mindedly promenaded along the streets leading to the park.

Lisa hadn’t always been so unbelieving. There was a time she belonged to that group of fanatics, a time she believed in God, a time she even wore robes and sang in the choir. She gave Him her all, until…she tried to swallow a tight knot in her throat as she relived the most painful part of her life-he took her all. Some tears escaped her firm grasp and freely flowed down her high cheek bones. It still felt like it had just happened, every time she recalled mom and dad strapped in the flaming car with no exit whatsoever. The car doors were slammed, as the policemen told her after the accident with an oil tanker. Where was God when she sat in the hospital, praying, crying, praying again, and singing? With the stabbing pain that rushed out from the depths of her heart, she squeezed the little paper with all her might. They didn’t deserve to die. They were good people. If He could save others in the Bible she once loved reading but couldn’t save the two people she loved the most in the world, then there was no need to go on with Him.

She climbed a little hill located at the east side of the park they loved going to. It was their favorite picnic spot. Mom and dad always took her there on Saturdays, along with the freshly baked cookies mom loved making because she knew it was her favourite. She took in a deep breath, relishing the aroma from mom’s kitchen. Mom and dad really loved God. They always said she should trust in Him. She wiped a straying tear and looked up to the skies and whispered ‘are you there?’ A part of her wanted so badly to feel his presence envelope her and his love overwhelm her heart. She desperately needed answers to the why questions; why did they die? Why couldn’t he save them? Why did he abandon her?

It had been a year since she last stepped into church or said a prayer or even read her Bible. She suppressed every thought that reminded her of his presence. He didn’t love or care about her and most likely never existed. He was probably just another figment of her imagination.

Mustering all the strength within her, she screamed ‘God, are you there?!’ The thunder roared, the lightning flashed and the rain began to pour down but Lisa was unperturbed by the elements. She wanted closure so bad. She needed to know if He took her parents away just to hurt her or for the fun of it. She imagined He would bellow from the Heavens and give her answers. But He didn’t.

The silence that followed overwhelmed her as the tears began to flow uncontrollably. She had never felt more alone in her entire life. Soaking wet, she began to trudge downward, oblivious to the heavy downpour.

Of course, he had abandoned her. No doubt. The rain mixed with the tears on her face, flowing in torrents. She made a decision. There was no going back. Closed up from love, she picked a new path for her life. A path dark as the night. Cold as ice.

© Mfon Etuk, 2015.

Photo Credit: waitingforbabybird.com
Photo Credit: waitingforbabybird.com
Posted on by Dainty M

Letters to God-1

photo credit: www.dailyedge.ie
photo credit: http://www.dailyedge.ie

Dear Dad,

I don’t know where to start or what to write. Do I ask about how you are faring? Do I ask of how your son is? Or how the billion children you have are? *awkward silence* This was probably a bad idea-you are way too busy solving world crisis to read this trivial letter.

I’m still here and I figured I might as well complete the letter I started. I want to talk to you so bad! Lately, I feel so distant. It’s like my life is constantly moving without direction. I feel it and I know it that I left you somewhere along the road. We used to be really close. But all I feel in my heart right now is emptiness, the void you left.

I don’t remember where I lost you. Was it when I got new friends? A new job? The cars and the fame? I’m calling out but I hear no answer. I’m reaching out but I can’t feel you…why are you so far from me? Please don’t let me go. Life is so scary without you. Monsters roam the world trying to prey on me, but you said you will pray for me…So why do I still feel afraid?

Fear wraps me about like a wet blanket, I lie in guilt and sleep with condemnation, and I thought I was a new nation…The past is gone, the new is here, the old creature is gone and I’m made new. But right now I feel I just delved back into the world, preferring the old coat to the new…

Frustrated, angry, depressed, can’t take this no more and then I turn to my demons. Pouring out all my secrets like a leaking pipe, so desperate for a word of comfort and a hug-I get none. Ashamed and alone I turn my back on the good, since the world is full of evil, let me be d-evil.

Words on paper don’t make any sense, I’m so tensed, can’t even complete my sentence. I guess what I’m trying to say is… I want to come back home. Like the prodigal son shamelessly feeding on the meal of pigs, I’ve eaten crap for so long it leaves me in tears. I miss you dad. Please take me back.

Love,

The prodigal.

©Mfon Etuk, 2015

Photo credit: https://melissaellefson.wordpress.com
Photo credit: https://melissaellefson.wordpress.com
Posted on by Dainty M · 15 Comments

The Night Before Light

tumblr_n3ejg6dtxz1s4sut4o1_500
Photo credit: http://www.rebloggy.com

Part One

Running, panting, falling,

There it was again, the monster she dreaded,

Ripping off everything that got in its way,

Green algae laced his hideous form,

Horns punctuated his face; his claws were of a bear,

He kept howling like a wolf,

Fear surrounded her like a fence,

Heart pounding, throat thickening, fists clenched, she tried to get up again,

Groping in the dark, trying to find her way,

Should she scream for help?

Who would answer her?

She was alone, just as she wanted,

Heavy footsteps kept getting closer,

Sweat and blood dripping from her as she tried to find a way out

The web she was in was all so scary,

There was no way out of it,

If there was a God, he sure wouldn’t want to save her-she was too far gone to be saved,

The hurt filled her heart till it began to overflow

Another shrill disturbed the silence of the night,

The monster had wrenched the heart of another victim,

For how long would she keep running in circles?

But who was she to end the life she never owned?

Lost, afraid, cold, lonely, she stopped running,

She shivered as the cold wind brushed her fragile skin,

With the shackles on her wrists and ankles,

She sat waiting for her turn like a cow led to slaughter,

If only He could save her-

If only He still loved her like He always said,

Wiping the tears off her dirt covered face,

She looked up to see the monster in front of her,

A knot tightened in her throat, too hard to swallow

There he was with the stench of death oozing out of him,

He stretched out his claws towards her heart,

The end had come for her,

He was going to rip off every bit of her,

Even though his blood thirst remained insatiable,

She knew she deserved this,

Shutting her eyes, she cried from the depths of her heart

JESUS!!!!

Thunder, lightning, earthquake-then came the silence

The silence that screamed louder than the storm,

She slowly opened her eyes,

The monster was gone,

Shackles fell off her wrists and ankles,

She was free, or was she dreaming?

blog image
http://www.loverofdarkness.net

Would the monster come again, stronger and more at rage than it was?

Footnote:

Lots of us struggle with one monster or the other(addictions, obsessions, things we would love to change, things we can’t tell anyone), we keep running around in the thick web of sins. But God is our ever present help in times of need, always ready to save you. Just call on Him. Its time to stop running.

© Mfon Etuk, 2015.

Posted on by Dainty M

Diary of a Blueblood Series 2

Trust
The word in itself is a very powerful one. It takes away the whole “dependent” from “I” meaning one no longer becomes that “independent” man or woman we crave to be, but rather we “depend” on others and “trust” them to either protect us, defend us, care for us, love us or even die for us.
No one is saying we shouldn’t trust. But rather trust the right person. Notice how there’s a “u” in the word ‘trUst’ rather than a “me”? That simply means that we are not meant to handle it all by ourselves. We are meant to let go and allow someone more reliable than we are to do the difficult tasks.
Trust goes beyond just saying you trust someone, it means believing and having faith in someone enough to leave your entire burden at their feet and letting them make things straight.

It’s the same way when it comes to our relationship with God. God is supreme. His love for us amounts to the number of billion stars we have in the sky and even more. Ever stopped to think about how He sent His only son to come and die for us?
“This is how much God loved the world: He gave His Son, His one and only Son. And this is why: so that no one need be destroyed; by believing in him, anyone can have a whole and lasting life.” (John. 3:16, MSG).

In present times, and not just in Africa alone, so many parents (fathers to be precise), whine a lot about how much they want male children. Do you think if they finally have a male child then they would ever let him go? I think absolutely not! But here’s God with a thousand angels to choose from to accomplish His goal but He picked His only Son to come on earth and die for the sins of you and I.

Looking at it, if someone I knew did something that big for me just so I can know that he loves me that much and that he has also forgiven me for all the wrong I have done, I don’t see any reason why I shouldn’t just give him my all and everything I have to be loyal to him in commitment and even in the most difficult of life issues!
God is my being. He formed me and therefore He knows me inside out more than anyone can, even much more than I do myself! The breath that I breathe is His and the life that I live was given to me by Him.

“And Jehovah God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and man became a living soul.” (Gen. 2:7, ASV)

In other words, He alone knows the challenges of this life and how to handle them more than even our parents who were born in the 60’s or even earlier. I don’t need to worry about what to wear tomorrow or how I’m going to get to the place I’m going to or even what I should eat tomorrow because He said;
“Be not therefore anxious, saying, What shall we eat? Or, What shall we drink? Or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed?”(Matt. 6:31, ASV)

Rather, all I need to do is just ask Him and ‘Trust’ that He will most definitely provide those things for me.

Yes, we are humans and we might not know it yet, but we actually do like to worry even to the point of “what color of underwear do I put on? I am not saying we shouldn’t be a little bothered (especially if it may seem somewhat impossible), but why not leave it to the ‘All Wise’ and ‘All Knowing God’? After all, that’s the favorite word that makes Him show Himself- “Impossible.” He would want us to say “this thing is impossible for me, but Nothing is impossible for God.” I’d like to think that those who came up with the phrase “nothing is impossible” actually coined it from that Bible passage: “with God ALL things are possible” (Matt. 19:26), therefore “nothing is impossible.”

Notice how the passage says ALL? Yes, ALL! Not some or a few or little things but ALL! My my, I would definitely want and love to have that one as a keeper. So why not try something different or do something you might have been scared of doing before. Provoke God. Tell Him that you’re extremely tired of carrying a truckload of over flowing problems and you’re ready to just drop all of them at His feet and let Him handle them Himself. Tell Him you’re ready to TRUST Him enough for Him to pick something beautiful for you to wear tomorrow. You TRUST Him enough for Him to give you a sumptuous and delicious meal and also you TRUST Him enough for Him to give you a most suitable, comfortable, safe and free ride to your destination.

The actual truth of the matter is that God has never failed before and not just for our sake but also for His name’s sake, He won’t start failing now. I’ll leave you with an assignment to do, take a week. Dedicate it to God and place all those numerous worries on Him. Don’t worry, He doesn’t mind, He actually really LOVES it when we do so. In fact, He has been waiting patiently for us to ask Him(in His mind He’ll be like ‘I thought you’d never ask’ with a huge smile on His face).
The only thing we would have to be concerned about is giving Him what I call ‘TPW’ which stands for; Thanksgiving, Praise and Worship. Can you imagine that? Having only to just give God TPW in exchange for solving those numerous X and Y questions we bother about. It’s completely mind blowing!

Trust Him. Even more than you would trust that boyfriend or girlfriend you’re dating, or you would trust the very woman who gave birth to you or the man who has taken care of you. If at the end of the week nothing works out or nothing good comes out of it, then, well He isn’t God. But if everything comes to you faster and much better and more beautiful than it would have had you done it on your own, then I think it’s time to start serving God with no doubt in your heart!
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.” (Proverbs 3:5-6)

Written by Omle Uche (www.diaryofablueblood.wordpress.com)

Posted on by Dainty M

Diary of a Blueblood Series

         GOD’S LOVE

I have often pondered on the concept of love and what it really means. I’ve pondered on how people can so freely and easily profess love for a person without knowing so much about them. But while pondering on it tonight, I’d like to think the Holy Spirit gave me more insights and understanding about it.
        For those people who are able to feel love, say ‘I Love You’, profess love, know love, for those people who are able to open themselves to an understanding of what love is…a huge amount of respect should be given to them. Because it is a sign that God lives in them (after all God is Love)!
“So we have come to know and believe the love that God has for   us. God is love; and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him.” (1John 4:16)
I say this because it is not easy to love…to open your heart to the possibility that you actually love someone. Oh yes, we might feel that way for so many people, I know I have! Or maybe we hear it every single minute, so much so that it becomes a cliche, but that doesn’t mean the person saying it does not actually love you or your loving all of them back does not make it real. Oh no.
The fact that we love so much is something to be celebrated because it shows that God is in our hearts. Love is God and God is Love.      

“Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is Love.” (1John 4:8)

Image by Hillary Grantham: Creationswap.com
So the next time you’re beating yourself up about how a person did not reciprocate your love advances or how maybe you think you love more than one person, be thankful to God that He has even given you the opportunity to love someone and most importantly a heart of love…large enough to accommodate the love for so many people.
Imagine all those people who don’t have the opportunity to hear someone tell them ‘I Love You’ or even have the chance to say ‘I Love You’ back. But majority of us hear it every day from so many people that we take it for granted.
Do you know how many times God tells us He loves us in the Bible? (So many times!) Yet, almost 95% of the world’s population is clueless of this truth. That’s why it is our duty, as people with God’s Love flowing through our veins to spread the truth about God’s Love to everyone. 

“God wants us to grow up, to know the whole truth and tell it in love – like Christ in everything. We take our lead from Christ, who is the source of everything we do. He keeps us in step with each other. His very breath and blood flow through us, nourishing us so that we will grow up healthy in God, ROBUST IN LOVE.” (Ephesians 4:15-16)

Image by Samluce.com
Don’t just limit love to the girl whose smile makes your heart beat or to the boy whose eyes light up when he looks at you. No one’s saying all those aren’t important, but let’s allow our hearts to skip a thousand beats for the child who is crying because she has no home. Let’s allow butterflies to dance in the stomach of that little boy just because you gave him a glass of water and if that family with hardly any clothes to put on asks you why you love them so, tell them it is because God first loved them.
“We love because He first loved us.” (1 John 4:19)
God’s Love should not be taken for granted. He did not send His only Son to die that we should forget what love is. No. We recognize how important it is and that’s the reason we are able to love so much and love so many. God is Great, and as such Love is Great! When we have the heart of Love, we have the heart of God, and by loving others, we love God. 

“So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, humility, quiet, strength, discipline. Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, WEAR LOVE. IT’S YOUR BASIC, ALL -PURPOSE GARMENT. NEVER BE WITHOUT IT.” (Colossians 3:12-14, MSG)

Written by: Omle Uche(my very good friend)

 Image by Scottchan: FreeDigitalPhotos.net