All our lives we’ve had the help of our parents in mapping out our life plans- nursery school, then primary school, then university. It’s as if they only planned to be with us for so long. And I get it. By twenty-something, you’re ‘supposed’ to be an adult, probably even married and beginning that entire lifecycle for someone else (a.k.a your kids). But not me. Well, not yet. I’m a twenty-something year old who constantly asks myself, ‘WTF am I supposed to be doing in life?’ If you’re like me, then this post is for you. Grab a cup of coffee and enjoy!
Ticking off the boxes of Bsc, MSc, NYSC, probably Marriage even, doesn’t mean you’re successful at being a twenty-something year old. I mean it counts for something, but it’s not everything. There’s a longing in each of us for something more. That’s why we change jobs like we change our outfits, why we move from relationship to relationship, why we hustle more, try to make cash quicker, and try to have fun harder. Or at least make it it look like we’ve got life figured out on social media. We’re all in need of something more!
I started with the opening of how a typical Nigerian kid is raised. Our parents were vested in our education. They wanted us to go through different school stages, they even paid for those in most cases, and for them, when you’re done, you’re done. You’re an adult now. Why? Because you have a Bsc or MSc or you’ve done NYSC (National Youth Service Corps). Whatever! You get it. They’re done. Get a freaking job and live your own life.
But what really is my life? When you’ve told me how to live my life all through these years? Is a job or marriage really an end in itself or a means to an end? What are you right now, if you’re not schooling or working? Who are you??
If you have never asked yourself some or all of these questions in the course of adulting, then, you’re probably fibbing. But hey, there’s no manual for being an adult. No incubator can prepare you for the harsh realities of life.
So here I am, a twenty-something that is tired of figuring out life alone. No one can do it alone. And that’s why we need God. Of course He has seen a million generations of twenty -something year olds, and He has seen them through it all. Think about young David, young Samuel, young Joseph, young Esther…. they must have had hormones raging and tons of questions to ask! I mean, none of them even ended up like their parents- they had to carve new paths and figure out life with God. (Really think about it for a minute- how did a shepherd boy end up in the palace?)
When you don’t know what next to do, talk to God about it. So what if you fail? (Okay, the anxiety stricken part of my brain cringed at that last question). Failing doesn’t make you any less. And most importantly, finding your purpose is the best part of the twenty-something year old. You can make your mistakes. Try out music, art, photography, psychology, whatever it is you have passion for. You’d eventually get a hang on something. And if you’re already starting a family, just remember now you have a new support system to navigate life with.
I’m a twenty-something year old that is sometimes (oftentimes!) stressed, tired, depressed, confused. But that’s okay. I have a God who has everything figured out. And in this hope, I know we’re all gonna be just fine!
Lots of love,