I have wondered lately, when I’ll be able to be like one of those. You know, those who wake up with one goal. Who chase after said goal tirelessly; investing time, degrees, jobs, promotions to the attainment of said plan. You know, those who study one thing, specialize in that one thing, get further degrees in same and get employed in what they’ve always wanted.

It’s funny when I say I’ve changed career paths severally. I still remember when I was applying for college. I didn’t have a particular course in mind; I just knew what I didn’t want to study. Take away core sciences, take away business courses, nothing extremely artsy- oh yeah, social science seems to do the trick. And voila! I ended up with international relations.

I’ve been out of school some 4 years now, haven’t used that degree for a day. I’ve been stuck on the bridge of masters. What do I specialize in? Why can’t I be like those who opted for ‘doctor’ ‘lawyer’ ‘engineer’ and have a straight path to follow? You know, after step 1 is step 2 and so on. Ugh! It can be so frustrating!

I’ve explored a couple of fields though. One moment I’m passionate about customer service, another time am passionate about data analysis, and then web content development and a mix of social media management. Okay, not so bad right? Why do I feel burnt out? Kinda like it’s time to find somewhere, anywhere that I can stick with and specialize.
I wish I had everything figured out. But I don’t. I may not be one of those who go in straight lines. Maybe I need the zig-zag in my life to keep me really living; to spread my wings when I want to, to do away with the conventional when it’s time. One thing I know is that He who holds my future is not struggling to write an end (like I do when writing stories). He’s already got it figured. In His steps, I want to follow. In His will, will I rest.

So here’s to everyone like me, struggling with career choices, academic clauses, and general societal pressures. You may not have it figured out now, but at the end, it will all make sense.

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.- Jer 29:11

Love,

M.