I’m so addicted to the pain
I don’t know how to live without it
I’m so addicted to the tears
I don’t wear mascara anymore
I’m so addicted to the hurt
It doesn’t hurt anymore

I’m addicted to them walking away
I don’t expect them to stay
I’m addicted to their lies
I don’t believe the truth
I don’t allow the wounds to heal
I’m so addicted to the pain
I don’t know how to live without it
I shut my blinds so the morning doesn’t come
So joy doesn’t come in the morning
I hide in the shadows provided by the night
And wallow in the tears I’ve cried

I’m so used to the burden on my back
I don’t know how to exchange it for any lighter
I’m so addicted to these chains
I fail to notice they are broken
I’m so addicted to my pain
I don’t know how to live in His victory.

Save me from these addictions
That have such a strong hold on me
These thoughts that are as thorns to your rooted word
These lies that I hold as truth
Save me from the pain I don’t know how to live without!

Β©Mfon Etuk, 2016

Some of us are so accustomed to the pain and hurt, the depression and addictions,we don’t even know how to live without them. But you can’t live anything short of victory after the bloody death Jesus died to give you life!
I declare freedom from every addiction and depression that has held you bound in Jesus name! Amen.


48 thoughts on “Pain Addict

  1. This is so beautiful. I was just having a conversation with a friend today concerning being addicted to pain. And this was exactly what we were saying. It’s like you spoke my mind on this one. Thank you for sharing.


  2. Amen!!
    The first step to getting healed is knowing and accepting that you are sick, but how do you get healed when the sickness has become a part of you because it has been accepted.
    May the Almighty God stretch His healing hand towards anyone imbibed in pain to relief them. Amen


  3. I’ve been like a masochist before, sticking my head in a meat grinder and begging for more. The dissonance this had caused within me diminished my ability to pull out…with every turn. It was like being caught in a sinister cycle until a force of intervention stepped in to stop the madness.


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