Month: July 2016

Fire and Wood

Posted on

After I typed the title, it made finally made sense why those logs of wood are often called firewood…I think I’m having a blonde moment 🙈

Let’s get to today’s post, shall we?

The scenario we’re gonna work with today is a fireplace with logs of wood burning ferociously. They could burn like that for a long time as long as the igniters are all in play. Now pick out a fiery log. Oh wait; let’s make the fireplace a campfire. So you need that fiery log to find your way through the buses in order to ease yourself or get some food or whatever. The log will serve as a torch for as long as it burns. However, if you go too far for too long, the fire will burn out. I hope I haven’t lost you in the woods…

Now that you’ve caught up, let’s move on. The family of Christ is likened to that campfire with fervent believers burning for the Lord. But that’s not all the believer has been called for. We are the light of the world. So yeah, you would be fulfilling purpose as you march through stark darkness shining the light of God. But hey, if you stay too long without going back to the fireplace, you would burn out. This is why we have church services every Sunday and several midweek services as well as various fellowships.

Not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you seethe Day drawing near. -Heb 10:25 (ESV)

If you’re still not a fan of going to church, you might wanna read this post on why I stopped going to church. The enemy knows the importance of going back to the fireplace and believe me he will do all he can to stop you. He’ll present excuses that seem valid to the human ears and soon enough you find yourself going months without returning to the fireplace.

As a single log of fire in the dark world, your fire is bound to go off if you neglect returning to the fireplace. BTW do you think the world appreciates you shining your light into their eyes and exposing the works of evil? Nope! They don’t. They’ll gladly convince you, persuade you, force you…till your light gets dimmer and you join in the darkness.

You can’t have mid light or mid darkness. There’s no room for lukewarm believers in this evil world. You’re either burning hot or just a cold log of wood in the darkness.

Why so much emphasis on returning to the fireplace? Back to the scenario…the fiery log you took out is getting dimmer as you go farther and stay longer. Then you try to find your way back to the fireplace and toss it back in. You’d be amaze how that log will begin to catch fire again. Remember when I said the igniters have to be in play? The Holy Spirit is the igniter. It’s no surprise that some fireplaces are all burnt out and full of ashes. Some believers have lost the power, love and sound mind. All they’ve become are busy bodies who seek to please the flesh. That’s a sad situation! But there’s always hope…a revival. If such cold and burnt out fireplace of believers humbly set aside ‘self’ and have a total revival, the fire will return!

If you’re firewood without fire, you’re just a wood.

Reflect:

Have you distanced yourself from the church? Do you feel burnt out? Are you a lukewarm believer with a foot in the world and the other in the church? Has your fireplace (church) become cold that no one is on fire for God anymore?

Reignite your fire today by returning to the fireplace. And if your fireplace is burnt out, champion a revival and plead to the merciful Father to ignite you again by the Holy Spirit.

The war is too hot in these last days for you to be cold.

PrayerDear Lord, I’m sorry I have strayed away from the believers to do things my own way. I feel burnt out. The things of God don’t excite me anymore. Please forgive me. Reignite my zeal for your house. Light us up for you. Cause a massive revival to sweep through cold fireplaces. In Jesus name I pray, amen. 

Thanks for reading!

Have a blessed week ahead!

©Mfon Etuk, 2016

Weekend Extra- Q & A

Posted on

Hey guys!
How’s the weekend going? It’s a rainy afternoon for me. I finally decided to leave my bed and go on a cruise. You know, get to know new places. I’d like to know how your weekend is going 😊
So yeah today is Q and A on the Weekend Extra. Remember this interesting story we read? https://daintym.com/2016/07/08/the-day-she-died/

Ok, some of you asked that we address the question below:

Why does love turn sour after ‘I love you’ is involved?

Put differently, why do people fall in and out of love so easily? You guys could have just been perfect friends and feelings come in to mess things up.
Anyway, I don’t know so much about this, but I would like to learn from your responses. Remember, no response is wrong.
Please express yourself in the comment section. You can also reply some other person’s comment agreeing or disagreeing.
Ps: This may be a good time to make new friends 😉
I wanna hear your answers! Thanks! 😘
Lots of love,

Little Girl

Posted on Updated on

This is where it all begun.

little
Photo Credit: freeimages.com

There was something about this little girl that drew me to her. She was African-American with big black eyes and wild black afro hair. From our first encounter, I sensed she had a nasty attitude. But I didn’t mind. I still wanted to talk to her. I watched her in the same spot she was yesterday. Once again, against my better judgment, I walked towards her.

‘Hello. What’s your name?’ I asked, squatting beside her.

She glared at me for a moment then continued scribbling on the ground.

‘What do you care?’ she finally replied

‘Please, I just want to be your friend.’ Her utmost look of shock was no surprise to me.

‘Why?’ She asked, still bewildered.

‘Because I want to know you.’ I seemed to have gotten her attention before I heard a voice calling out behind us ‘Rasheedah!’ I turned back to see the really skinny black woman on dreadlocks. She looked like she was in her late 20s. The little girl scampered to go and meet her. The woman had quite a scary air about her, I could understand why the little girl was so afraid.

I turned back to go get my daughter, Karen when I noticed a white piece on the ground. I carefully unwrapped it and the first sentence struck me like a thunder bolt.

I feel like dying,

Just put an end to my misery,

This life isn’t worth living,

I can still hear the kids laughing,

Well, the joke’s on them,

Though they may never notice when I’m gone- no one will

I’m the invisible girl

 

I read the note 5 more times. It left me distressed. My thoughts spiraled. I couldn’t comprehend how a little girl could be so- disturbed? Is that the word? Why did she want to kill herself? I was more curious about her now.

‘Mom!’ Karen’s voice broke through my thoughts. I quickly hid the note and went home with my little girl.

****

I drove so fast to go pick my daughter because I wanted to continue from where I stopped with Rasheedah. I prayed I could get to her before she took her life away.

I heaved a sigh of relief as I saw her petite frame crouching on the same spot. My heart went out to her. I stooped beside her once again.

‘I saw your note.’ Ignoring her puzzled look, I went on, ‘why do you feel like dying?’ I asked holding out the note.

She grabbed it from me and store it safely in her dirty pink bag.

‘Please talk to me. I want to help you.’

‘You can’t.’ she snapped. I could see the pain in her eyes. She had probably seen too much darkness for a little girl.

Day after day, I went to see her and talk to her. Karen finally came around and left me undisturbed with the little girl.

This beautiful day was special. The sun was out; the birds were chirping. I went to meet Rasheedah as usual and we spoke briefly. Well, I spoke mostly and she just nodded. After much hesitation, she reached out to her backpack and brought out a rumpled diary with dog-eared leaflets.

‘Here. Read this. If you still want to be my friend afterwards, you know where to find me.’ She stood up and disappeared in the crowd of kids while I kept staring at the diary. Finally, I would get to know why she was so- different.

©Mfon Etuk,2016.

Colorblind

Posted on

I keep coming across some powerful blog posts that address the current issues the world is facing, racism and hate being at the forefront. I hope you learn a thing or two from this great post by MaryRose. God bless you!

Out Loud

A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another.“~ John 13:34 (NKJV)

When my son, Eric, was 12 years old, he fell in love (for the second time.)  Her name was Jasmyn.  I will never forget the day he came home from school and began to tell me all about this beautiful girl that he met.  She was smart…and pretty…and funny… and kind… He went on and on about her that day and for many days to come.

At one point, Eric invited Jasmyn to the house to play video games and I offered to pick her up.  We pulled in front of her home and out came this beautiful young lady, just as pretty as Eric had described.  The thing that I found most interesting is that at no time in any of…

View original post 447 more words

Self Hate

Posted on

I hate my body, she said, 

And my heart sank

Because clearly she didn’t think I did a good job creating her 

She began to pull chunks of flesh that I had so intricately formed 

She pointed at spots that I had used to punctuate her perfect skin 

 

I hate my body, he said 

As he used his skin as a canvass for artwork 

Soon enough it was hard to tell his skin tone 

As all I could see were tattoos carved on the skin I had taken so much time to form 

 

I hate my body she said 

As she cut herself up 

Absorbing all the drugs she could 

Just to take her mind off her hurt and insecurities 

 

I hate how I look! He yelled 

Abusing substance more than one could imagine 

Getting so high 

Surely he was about to fall 

 

Why did you make me? 

She sobbed while standing on the bridge 

Ready to disappear in the waters 

At least one less ugly duckling 

Would make the world a better place 

Or so she thought 

 

It grieved me that they couldn’t see 

What I saw 

So short-sighted, 

They needed glasses to see 

How I made their skins  

So unique,  

The sun couldn’t scar it 

The cold winter couldn’t mar it 

 

Who told you that you were ugly? 

Better yet, 

Who can make a better you? 

Please raise your hands!

Let’s enter a contest and see who wins 

 

Just because you create little Barbie dolls 

Doesn’t mean you make the perfect body 

Oh please! Humour me by creating man!  

Who said stitching yourself all over would make you beautiful? 

I look down and wonder where my daughter is 

 

Do you think for a moment 

That I lied when I said you were good? 

Good enough, 

I had to rest from making you 

 

Who made the birds? 

Do you think for a moment 

That I who made those beautiful creatures 

Would not also make you more beautiful? 

 

I crafted you with my hands 

I knew you before you were conceived 

Please don’t believe the lies that you were a mistake 

You were ordained from the start 

Check the master plan if you doubt 

 

I made you unique 

One of a kind 

Custom designed  

If you doubt, check who matches your fingerprints 

 

Why grieve me? 

Why make me sad? 

My dear one 

Don’t believe the lies 

Don’t hurt yourself 

Because you’re hurting me in the process 

 

I still love you.

-From Your Father

  ©Mfon Etuk, 2016

 

 

Style 101: Work Outfits

Posted on Updated on

Hey guys!

It’s the Weekend Extra post! Woo-hoo! How’s your weekend going? Mine has been pretty lazy with my eyes glued to the screen. I just watched the movie ‘Me Before You’ and it made me shed a few tears. I’m not a fan of tragic endings but this left me torn. Like really, why do people have to die and leave their lovers in pain? (Oops, spoilers!)But it’s really sad! 😦 😦

Moving on, I’ve had some fashion posts in my head I never really get to put up 🙈 so here is one of such. This is more like a mix and match set of outfits for work. Sorry guys, I still haven’t gotten any outfits here for you. But hey, if you’re a guy that’s into fashion we could work something out!  😀

style
Photo Credit: Likesuccess.com

Work environments differ but the outfits here are pretty simple and very comfy. If your environment isn’t too strict about corporate wears, then you can work with these outfit ideas.

Certain basic things you must have in your wardrobe: 

  1. Blazer- I love blazers and I believe they can turn a casual outfit into something presentable. Boyfriend blazers have the unique blend between masculinity and femininity.  Phototastic-19_07_2016_b841a53c-e3ca-45c0-9b79-06d678939d92
  2. Neutral slacks and skirts – these provide the foundation when building outfits. If your bottoms are toocolourful, it would be a bit confusing when it comes to mixing tops. Keep the bottoms plain and simple (as it’s a work outfit)
  3. Dresses- oh yes! I love dresses because they are super chic. Definitely a must have for any lady!
  4. Basic accessories- these include shoes (both flats and heels), bags, neck pieces, bracelets, earrings and belts. Certain mild rules apply when mixing accessories with outfits. Stick to simple accessories that are work friendly.
  5. Blouses and shirts- I’m not really a fan of tailored and structured shirts (but you’d need more of those in a strict corporate workplace) I really love blouses and chiffon tops though. They are comfortable and quite flattering. Phototastic-19_07_2016_8fe72acf-b621-4277-bf0d-9ad4857779ce

When it comes to dressing, I’ve got certain principles that guide me and I believe everyone should have such when building a personal style. Modesty is key when it comes to dressing (particularly work outfits) I also value comfort a lot and I stick more with comfy cropped pants, light blouses (because of the heat) and shift dresses. I also do more of ballet flat shoes than heels. Sneakers are my favourites whenever I get the chance to use them!

Confession: I love styling my outfits for a month and write them in my wardrobe planner. 🙈 I love helping people sort out their wardrobe for a period of time with a detailed plan to stick with (we all know how exhausting it is to wake up not knowing what to wear). So hey, if you need a wardrobe planer, you’ve got me! (I’m just a mail away!) 😃

Have you got a personal style? Or some signature outfits? Please share!

Love,

daintym

 

 

 

Music or nah?

Posted on Updated on

‘Mom, I want to study Music’ I heard my little brother say from across the room. I unconsciously closed my book as I directed all attention to the ensuing conversation.

My mother took some minutes to regain her composure after such shocking news my brother had so lightly delivered. ‘Why Music?’ My mother finally asked.

‘I love music. I don’t imagine studying any other course. To be honest, nothing else interests me.’ He spoke out of sincerity.

My mom paused for a while before she spoke ‘we’ll discuss this when your dad returns’.

We all knew what that meant. It was never a good thing. It was more like facing a panel of unbreakable opinions. I was quite curious about the end of this news my brother had courageously exposed.

Jide, my little brother was the musician of the family. Everyone knew that. But studying Music as a course? That was a hobby gone too far. I couldn’t help but admire how gutsy he was. I was never so bold to confront my parents about my interests. I was the perfect kid, you may add. Graduated top of my class. Followed dad’s career path of being a Diplomat. I love my job. But then again, I can hardly hide my inclination for fashion designing. The first time I mentioned that to my dad as a kid led to an outburst of laughter I had never heard before. In but a few seconds, he had successfully crushed whatever desires I had of pursuing fashion designing. As I said earlier, I love my job. Or am I just trying to convince myself?

‘Funmi!’ My mother’s voice pierced through my thoughts.

‘Yes mom’ I abruptly responded, following the direction of her voice which led me to their bedroom.

‘What’s wrong with your brother eh? Why does he insist on disappointing us?’ She barely waited for me to close the door before she began her lamentations.  I quietly sat beside her on the bed and leant her the listening ears she desperately needed, pending when my dad would return from his conference.

I was a bit confused at my mom’s undisguised displeasure at my brother’s decision. If anything, she was the more liberal one in my family who believed in pursuing one’s dreams. As a successful social worker, she always used herself as an example when it came to the wholehearted pursuit of purpose. So why was this different? Why was mine different? Not like I ever pushed for it seriously. But why was this different? I returned to the issue at hand.

‘Mom, what’s wrong with studying Music?’ I was clearly treading on enemy territory with that question but I just couldn’t help it.

Just as I had expected, she gave me the look. The look that a typical Nigerian mom gives her child who is asking a rather stupid question. She began to voice out her fears on how he would be perceived. The son of an honourable Diplomat turning out to be a musician? After paying so much money for school. She heaved a deep sigh and secured her face in her palms. She was so concerned about the perception that would come our way from the thousand unrelated acquaintances she had. I didn’t know what else to say so I quietly enjoyed the silence.

Although we had lived abroad for well over 10 years owing to dad’s career, my family was still as African as our skin colour. Of course remaining true to who we are is a major plus but often times, traditional thinking such as this leaves me rather frustrated.

I tried to ease my mom out of her fears reminding her of famous musicians who even perform for the presidents and ceremonial heads.

‘Just imagine the honour it would be to see Jide performing at the President’s ball or any elitist party’ I babbled relentlessly. Trust me to see the silver lining behind every cloud, I was known for that.

That seemed to brighten her up a little as she lifted her eyes as though seeing the picture of the future.

‘Our son could become a famous musician ‘ she thought aloud. I nodded in affirmation.

Jide who had been eavesdropping smiled and hugged me as I got out of my mom’s room. I admired his dogged nature and I believed in him.

‘Don’t get too excited. Mom spoke with dad and he said it’s either you go to Julliard or you study something else’ a smirk played across my face because I knew my brother as a hip hop artist who didn’t really appreciate classical.

‘That’s not a problem’ he said with a wink and skedaddled.

I wonder what would have happened if I had taken the leap of faith as he did. If I turned my so-called fashion designing hobby into reality. I can’t start crying over spilled milk jare. It’s too late. Or is it really? Is it ever too late as long when you’re still alive and breathing?

©Mfon Etuk, 2016.

*****

What do you think about the idea of influencing your child’s course of study? (bearing in mind that kids never really know what they want). Would you rather say it’s a way of protecting kids from the disappointments that come with pursuing hobbies? As a parent, would you allow your kid study any course (even when you know it’s not a serious money-maker)? I’d like to hear your thoughts!