Month: May 2016
Urrrgh! No one ever wants to be weak and helpless. Between the options of being as strong as superman or being a wimpy kid, I’m guessing we would pick superman; saving the day! Okay, maybe not superman but you get the point; no one wants to be helpless.
Let me remind you what being helpless feels like… Watching your house get burnt and not being able to pick out anything, save your skin; being blank in the examination hall while others seem to be asking for extra sheets; not being able to pay your fees because your parents are trying all they can to cater for you and your siblings; stuck in an addiction you’ve tried and tried to get out from-self-help aint so helpful after all. Being heartbroken from that relationship you thought would last forever or being robbed in your car while stuck in traffic and others keep passing as though you’re suddenly invisible! There are so many situations that leave us feeling weak and helpless and I know we have some experiences to share as well!
At the moment of helplessness, we cringe, we feel low, lost, needy and weak. Now this isn’t some psychology course, so relax.
But it’s totally okay to be helpless sometimes.
I once heard a story about a man who was drowning and he kept struggling to fight against the waves that were pulling him under. The lifeguard wasn’t far away but he didn’t step in to help the man until the man stopped fighting and gave up. The lifeguard swooped in like a superhero and pulled the man out of the overwhelming waters. When asked later on why he didn’t go in while the man was still beating against the waves, he said the man would have drowned them both. He had to wait till the man totally surrendered.
Well, God knows you’re struggling. He can see you even in the dark corner where you think no one can see through. He even sees through the charades that you put up, appearing to be superman when you’re just a nerdy Clark. But he wouldn’t step in and help if you’re still forming ‘I can do it on my own’. You have to come to that helpless state where you say ‘you know what Lord, I can’t do this. I really can’t help myself. Please help me!’ It will amaze you how the Heavenly Superhero will swoop in and pull you out by His strong right hand.
I don’t know what you’re dealing with right now, but I need you to know it’s okay to feel helpless. For when we are weak, He is strong. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Remember the batman signal? Well, you can also contact heavenly help lines (through prayers) or use the distressed signal (by calling His name) so He can step in and help you.
I pray you find help when you’re helpless.
Have a super duper week ahead!
©Mfon Etuk, 2016
This story isn’t over, was the last thing I said and meant. It rained again today. But this time I was too weary to write. I ponder on a lot of things. And this time the difference between love and hate. I’m a hopeless romantic- you probably knew that already. Even though I constantly conceal that with a tough exterior. But I can’t lie to myself- even if I lie to others.
So yes I took the trip. And I met someone. We connected within a couple of days and just couldn’t get by without talking. He was eccentric- like me- and I liked him. He is an artiste. Sings for a living. To be honest, I don’t see the job security in that as there are a million other artistes around. Well, who am I to judge? I travel for a living. That’s as insecure as a job can get. Not a job, more like my life. But that’s okay.
He was sweet. His smile was full of radiance like the sun rising from the East over soft blue skies. He was spontaneous. He had this cheerful demeanor and his eyes pierced through the soul.Oh and yes he writes songs. He wrote one for me while we were in Greece and I loved it.
We toured the beautiful streets of Greece hands entwined. He made me laugh a lot more than I can remember doing. maybe I just needed a reason to laugh away my pain. He wasn’t into food and would pass on the traditional meals I was crazy about. I should probably write on the confessions of a foodie as I am one myself.
Greece was a time of refreshing and he definitely made it worth it.
So are we together? You may ask.
He is married.
Found his ring in his guitar case. Of course I asked about it and then he stuttered a bit before explaining how he was having issues with his wife and needed to take a break. Sighs.
Isn’t it crazy how two people who couldn’t get their hands off each other while dating turn out to be two strangers who can’t stand being together in the same room?
Love and hate, such a thin line in between! One day you’re professing your deep undying love for her. The next, you shout hate words and stomp away never to look back.
It’s mind boggling! I once had someone declare his affectionate love for me. Called me all the sweet names in the book. But in the blink of an eye it was all over, and it was like nothing ever happened. The love words were gone. The sweet names, gone. It was as though nothing ever existed. Call me disillusioned.
How thin is the line between love and hate that people easily drift in and out of? Where does the passion all go to?
Love for me is a dream. It’s either I sleep on till death or I wake up and it’s gone. But not everyone likes sleep. Some people just have to wake us back to reality. Rather unfortunate, if you ask me. I wish we could love and not hate. But in reality, I believe more in hate than love. It surprises me when people say they are in love. Maybe I’m just being cynical. But it works fine for me.
Greece was great. His name was George. And no he didn’t use the second ticket I had. I’ll probably use it some other time. But for now, I’m all set to go back home.
The weather is beautiful. The birds are chirping away. I waved at him one last time from the window of the cab, heading towards the airport. My heart is still a mess. But I’ll be fine. This story isn’t over yet. Stay with me.
©Mfon Etuk, 2016
When living like you is want I want to do
I find myself being called an imposter
‘Cause I only love when I feel like
Talk about God when it’s convenient
I’m so scared of being called a ‘Jesus Freak’
When I would rather be the coolest one on fleek
Pssst! That’s easy!
Do I really have to?
See I know you died for my sins
But every day I feel like I’m nailing you to the cross
By the lies and pretence I play like candy crush
Help me Lord!
Now that’s my heart cry
I realize I’m no superhuman
Even though I have the supernatural genes
In my blood
Flowing from the blood which spilled on the cross
Now how do I,
A child of the king
Live on earth with no authority?
How do I rule and reign with Christ
When my eyes still lust after the kingdom of the world?
I want to live like you
Now that’s more than just a prayer
Cause I know living like you
Means loving others the way you do
Staying at peace with all men like you
Withdrawing from the crowd and fame
To go to the Father, hallowing His name
I realize I can’t live like you on my own
They can see through my facade
So please help me
A mere mortal
By the touch of immortality
Keeping me above immorality
Help me not to get entangled in the web
That I forget to ‘X’ the page
And turn to you for a clear reboot
Unclutter my soul and ‘shift + Del’ my messes
I want to be like you in every single way
And if I have to die everyday
Help me pay the prize
Cause being just like you is all I want to be
©Mfon Etuk, 2016
So I’m starting a new category called the Fiction Fridays and I hope to be posting fiction stories every Friday. This is intended to help me work more on my fictional writing skills as well keep you entertained! This doesn’t interrupt the usual Sunday posts though. Thanks for your support and encouragement as always! ❤ ❤
Here is today’s post!
I’m in a good place. Well, who wouldn’t be while taking in the breath after a fresh rain? I’m sitting in a yoga position, staring out of the window while listening to the birds chirp away. It’s still drizzling outside. I snuggle closer to Dex, my big fluffy bear.
I’m in a good place. This time it has nothing to do with the cozy weather or the weekend that is almost over. I’m in a good place in my heart. I don’t feel it beating as much as it used to when I see him or hear his name. Yesterday he got married. I was there. And I cried. Not because I was particularly happy for him. But because it would have been me. But it wasn’t.
I’m no longer sad. I know I played my cards wrongly. Well, when I make love a game, I lose. But when I don’t care, I get more than I bargain for.
I never liked them. Now I wonder if I’m just writing because the weather is beckoning to my artistic side like a groom beckons his bride? Is that why I always wanted to travel?
He sure wanted to make me his bride but that felt like clipping my wings. He didn’t want a wife who would scarcely be around. But I didn’t want to stay in either. I’m an explorer, call me Dora- or better still, Ford. As in Ford Explorer. The next car I intend to get before sojourning in Kenya.
Home doesn’t feel any different. If that’s what I can call this place. The place where it all began. Out on the cottage on a rainy day. He covered my hair with his shirt, while keeping me company as I waited for my mom who forgot to leave the keys out for me. We talked, we laughed, and we loved. Or so I thought.
I’ve never really gotten the concept of love. One minute you’re in love. The next, you hate them. I mean, isn’t there middle grounds somehow? Or is it all lust? Well, in that case, I lusted after his intellect, got teased by his wit and dived into his mind’s depth. It was never about the physicals-don’t get me wrong, he was good looking. But that wasn’t the main attraction.
We connected. Like a phone to a familiar WiFi. Once I had the password, I never had to retype it. We automatically synchronized. Now I sound as though I’m not over him. But I am! Lies I tell myself.
The tea kettle is whistling in the kitchen. I need to go get a napkin before I get burnt-again. Reminds me of that fateful winter night in Roehampton. We were both reading for our examinations. I was cold and needed some tea. I picked the kettle without a napkin and got burnt. Stupid me! He smiled while treating the injury with some items from the first aid box. His medical degree always came in handy as I was accident prone. Call me clumsy. As in one of the smurfs.
What am I doing? Going round in circles as I always do. Circled round Africa the last year and lost my love in the process. Only saw him on the weekends. Half of which he was working. It’s no surprise he married his colleague. I don’t really care about that. I guess.
7 years down the drain. But I’m good. Flushed the memory. I’m fine.
I wish him a happy life with whatever her name is. I’ll move on. Besides I’ve got two tickets to Greece. One was for him. But it’s okay. There’ll always be another one. This story isn’t over.
©Mfon Etuk, 2016
We cannot talk about victorious living without talking about vices.
The dictionary defines it as an immoral or evil habit or practice. It is also defined as a fault, defect, or shortcoming. Other synonyms include failing, weakness, flaws, sin or imperfection.
When we view vices in the general term of the word, we still realize that young people play the major role in what is termed as vices in a society.
However, they didn’t begin to do that overnight. It all started from an inner struggle with their evil habits and weaknesses.
What are your vices?
I need you to take some time to think about that question. Truth is, the first step in overcoming and gaining victory is in knowing what the enemy is. Possibly, you’re the only one who knows about it. But then again, you can fool everyone but not yourself and definitely not God.
From my experience with vices, I know it ties the victim with cords of shame; the feeling of not being good enough or perfect enough or even ‘godly’ enough comes along with it. It’s a sad, depressing feeling. While society might go all out to punish young people for performing such vices, I’ve come to know it’s not always as willful as we think it is.
It’s a constant battle between good and bad, right and wrong. We want to be moral but we find ourselves doing what is tagged ‘immoral’. We want to do good but we find ourselves doing bad. We want to be free but day after day we fall into bondage. This is a struggle Paul faced as well;
I decide to do good, but I don’t really do it; I decide not to do bad, but then I do it anyway. My decisions, such as they are, don’t result in actions. Something has gone wrong deep within me and gets the better of me every time.
It happens so regularly that it’s predictable. The moment I decide to do good, sin is there to trip me up. I truly delight in God’s commands, but it’s pretty obvious that not all of me joins in that delight. Parts of me covertly rebel, and just when I least expect it, they take charge.
I’ve tried everything and nothing helps. I’m at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn’t that the real question? -Rom 7:19-24 (MSG)
This struggle from within has resulted in suicides for some people and for others, prison sentences. Of course, that’s when the vice leaves the secret corner of our personal space to the public space. For some of us, it is still an internal battle which we somehow feel is ‘controlled’ enough. But if vices could become so destructive, we need to nib it in the bud!
Am I a pro in overcoming vices? Nah. I’m still overcoming mine. But I know someone who is a pro in thrashing everything that isn’t good in us- God! The triune God makes this possible for us by; 1. Jesus died and His blood cleanses us from all unrighteousness. 2. The Holy Spirit lives in us, searches our hearts for these evil habits and helps us deal with them.
Paul also admits:
The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions where I want to serve God with all my heart and mind, but am pulled by the influence of sin to do something totally different.- Rom 7:25 (MSG)
Don’t struggle with the vices alone. I know you may not be comfortable telling anyone about it. I know how people could change in a second when they hear the vices we deal with! But it’s okay. They are humans, they have the right to freak out and probably stay away from us as the plague. But God- He wouldn’t flinch for a second when you tell him about the vices you struggle with. He will gladly help you get free from them.
Therefore, if the Son sets you free, you really will be free. –John 8:36
It’s pretty dangerous to get stuck in your head. A lot of people have been destroyed by their vices. If you’re reading this right now and you’re honest enough to admit you also have some vices of your own, then it’s time for you to get free. It’s time to tell God about it and stop struggling on your own. Stop trying to hide it from Him.
I pray for you right now, that you overcome the vices in your life and you begin to walk in the victory Christ won on the Cross for you. You are free from today, in Jesus precious name. Amen!
It’s always my desire that you live victorious lives!
Lots of love,
©Mfon Etuk, 2016
I have been behind on the award front and I finally had to pull myself from the ‘Post-challenge stress’ After writing through April, my fingers have felt a little stiff lately. Anywho, write I must and write I shall! 😀
Thank you TJ from Studiotj for this nomination. You remain a breath of fresh air! I love your blog and you guys should totally check it out for that little positive spin you need! 😀
- Write a post to show your award.
- Give a brief story of how your blog started.
- Give two pieces of advice to new bloggers.
- Thank whoever nominated you and provide a link to their blog.
- Select 15 other blogs you want to give the award to.
I’ve always loved writing and it just made sense to own a blog. Got inactive for some two years and finally got serious in 2014. It progressed from random rambles to a purposeful blog and it keeps getting better! 😀
Stay true to yourself. Just keep being you. Write all you can and about anything you want. For the likes and follows, they will come. Just keep being you.
Keep friendships with bloggers beyond the ‘blogosphere’. This year has been exciting for me because I’ve been chatting with some bloggers outside the blogosphere and it’s so amazing! Beyond writing, making friends is a huge plus for me! So yes, I advise you to do same.
And the nominees are:
I hope y’all enjoy doing this award! 🙂 ❤
Lots of love,